First things first...Blogging hiatus explained.
The reason that I haven't blogged in such a long time is that my ongoing war with real life versus my expectations has reached a pinnacle. I've held the belief that if I tried harder, got up earlier, ran faster, gave more, etc., that things would work out the way I wanted them to. Just like the eagle eggs in Nacho Libre, these things are a LIE and I am fighting against the universe's insistence that I learn this sad, sad lesson. The practice of this philosophy hasn't given me what I want at all. I haven't blogged because I'm hoping that lack of documentation of the last few months will aid me in forgetting what a disaster I have felt like.
That explained, here's my plan for 2010:
Last year's idea to include inspiring words to live by with my resolutions was a bust. I began too many things, persevered through many, and excelled at NONE (except ounces of Diet Dr. Pepper consumed). I am starting out 2010 very discouraged. Here is a mere sampling of what is getting me down:
* I've got nearly 20 extra pounds hanging around and no desire to do what it takes to banish them.
* I find it nearly impossible to keep my cool with my teenager.
* I'm lazy at work but consistently agree to take on more when asked.
* My Christmas decorations are STILL up!
* The house is a wreck. I'm totally disorganized and haven't the will to de-junk and tackle the mess.
The reason that I haven't blogged in such a long time is that my ongoing war with real life versus my expectations has reached a pinnacle. I've held the belief that if I tried harder, got up earlier, ran faster, gave more, etc., that things would work out the way I wanted them to. Just like the eagle eggs in Nacho Libre, these things are a LIE and I am fighting against the universe's insistence that I learn this sad, sad lesson. The practice of this philosophy hasn't given me what I want at all. I haven't blogged because I'm hoping that lack of documentation of the last few months will aid me in forgetting what a disaster I have felt like.
That explained, here's my plan for 2010:
Last year's idea to include inspiring words to live by with my resolutions was a bust. I began too many things, persevered through many, and excelled at NONE (except ounces of Diet Dr. Pepper consumed). I am starting out 2010 very discouraged. Here is a mere sampling of what is getting me down:
* I've got nearly 20 extra pounds hanging around and no desire to do what it takes to banish them.
* I find it nearly impossible to keep my cool with my teenager.
* I'm lazy at work but consistently agree to take on more when asked.
* My Christmas decorations are STILL up!
* The house is a wreck. I'm totally disorganized and haven't the will to de-junk and tackle the mess.
I have bid farewell to delusions that I might become a more temperate Gloria Steinem, a mormon Mother Teresa, a less-annoying Don Aslet, an honest Hiliary Clinton, a drawl-less Dr. Phil, a normally nostriled Jillian Michaels, a less wealthy but equally generous Oprah Winfrey, or any other noted world-changer. Even my smallest of goals for self-improvement and mastery go unmet day after day, year after year. So, spurred by a pattern of hard work not working out and an overwhelming desire to take a nap under my desk at work last week, it's time to lower the bar and do the opposite of what I've tried for too long. My new role model...
GEORGE COSTANZA.
If you drop by, you will find me draped in velvet eating a block of cheese the size of a car battery. Happy New Year!!
11 comments:
Rita, you are the greatest whether it's by the 2009 standards or your new ones. Love ya!
I should say I'm sorry you are feeling bad and it'll get better and all that, but I can't stop laughing about George Costanza. That is funny. At least you have your sense of humour. And don't worry about the tree, in 340 days, you'll be ahead of the game.
I just love you and I also adore George Costanza. We all understand how you're feeling. It's part of that goal setting thing. Maybe that's why I avoid setting goals anymore. Vague improvements sometimes are easier.
You are great! And you're doing just fine.
You always no how to sum up life and make EVERYONE feel better. Please invite me when you start your book tour. I know it will be loads of fun. LOVE YOU.
Ok.....please excuse my typing. It's 4:30.....have no idea why I am up. I do KNOW the difference between NO and KNOW. Sorry.
Rita, Rita, Rita. You have summed up the history of my life. When Melissa was transcribing my missionary journal from 1964-66, she said to me, "Dad, you have the same goals and failures you had 45 years ago!" Not true. I no longer chew my fingernails.
Ahhh I am happy to see that you are blogging again. I always love the real you because that is the best!!! You are doing better then you think, hence that is why you are my bestest
LOVE YOU! Don't be so hard on yourself. You're awesome and talented and don't perceive yourself in the positive light that the rest of us do.
Hang in there.
(And keep blogging...I've missed hearing you!)
The George Costanzo "opposite" episode is a classic! I think we should all implement that strategy!
Glad to see you back in the blogging world. We are always our worst critic. I think you are great, and I've always admired you for just being you.
I hope you have a wonderful 2010, and you remember that the world is a good place because of the "average" people who are trying to do better a little at a time.
Hang in there!
Rita, you are so funny! I love reading your blogs!!!!
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